December 17, 2009

Mom's Confession:Kid's Online

I signed up my Facebook account few months ago. I did it to monitor my children's activities online. So that means my children got their individual accounts before I did.

Although they're only allowed to be online on weekends, still it was a real blessing for my children to be connected with friends and relatives as we are living away from our home country. My girls can play and farm together with their cousins online and exchange virtual gifts.

But 2 things came up yesterday: a friend's post and an article online (see links below) caught my attention. So we had to talk as a family and decided that my girls (7 and 10) had to say goodbye to their Facebook friends. Surprisingly, it was a quick unanimous decision and the girls are willing to wait till they're 13 to qualify to be on social network again.

So they said goodbye. We got strong reactions and relatives are asking "Why?!!!". It's sad to end this but all I can say is, as a family we are committed to observe all righteousness.

As a parent, I take responsibility of this mistake. I don't know how they got their accounts when they're still under 13. It's an obvious violation of the network's terms and conditions. My ignorance is not innocence. I let it slip. So it's not an excuse.

To my friend, Judy, thank you for your brave post This Whole MySpace Thing. I'm sorry to have indirectly offended you. I take it as a rebuke from a friend.

Better is open rebuke
Than love that is concealed.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend,
But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.
Proverbs 27:5-6


Aussie Therese said...

It takes a big person to admit they have made a mistake and correct it Ruth.

That is what you have done.

Elisa said...

I have thought of this before. My kids are 4 and 1 and have facebook accounts, ONLY so that I can tag them in pictures. Once they are older, above 13 or whatever age we decide, we will let them view their accounts and see all their "baby" pictures. Their "friends" are family members and godparents only. I do this because even my close friends and even some family members will post negative or obscene statuses, containing curse words sometimes. I don't know how, but I can read my brother's friends' comments and they are NOT good. VERY innapropriate, so I would never want my children to see those.

~ Judy ~ said...

OH did NOT offend me directly, nor indirectly!!!!!!!!!!! It sounds as though you did not lie, nor did you allow lying for the purpose of your kids getting the accounts...seems that something slipped by the administrators their and you were unaware.
My post led into a discussion which seemed to focus (in the comments) mainly upon the "under-age aspect"...but the post itself addressed more than involved the troubling "trend" (if-you-will) of people I know to be EXTREMELY intelligent, well-read, well-written, and well-educated passing themselves off as crude garbage mouths who can't write a grammatically correct sentence...ON PURPOSE...this is what initially made me SOOOO sad. The underage part directly affected me because it happened to be a close family member who had supported her young daughter in lying about her age to get an account. You are SUCH a kind and beautiful person Ruth...I AM glad if the post and those who commented helped your family to have clarification and foresight into what your convictions are and how you wish to live...but PLEASE do not think I was rebuking you personally in ANY way. I am blessed to have a friend like you!
I need to add that I was also disturbed because some of the people I know who have pages are Christians in positions of teaching and influence of children and their pages are full of "dark evil forces" items and "friends"...VERY disturbing things...witchcraft, vampires, etc... THIS is what disturbed me so much for these people portray themselves as believers and Children of the Light AND have JOBS in this field...but yet, they have this "secret" other side. Again, I thank you for your openness and beautiful thoughts shared about your dear family:)

ruth said...

Dear Judy,
I know you didn't mean that post for me because you don't know I'm in FB ;-)
The Holy Spirit can use anything to catch our attention and to bring conviction to our hearts. He spoke to me thru your post so I had to respond. No matter how I see it, we have done a violation and it's something to be corrected. There's no explaining. And my children are willing to give up their enjoyment for the sake of righteousness.
I know of other families who are in the same boat, they can explain their action, they may have good reason but as for me, I don't want this to slip again or I'll be callous to discern sins in my life.
You are a dear friend and I appreciate your honesty and courage to point out things that most of us tend to ignore. The world needs more people like you.
On your side,

Anonymous said...

I want to thank you for your sweet comments on my recent post. My kids are grown now, but even when they were in their late teens I had to monitor and discuss with them what they were getting exposed to on the internet. It can be very destructive to young people who are vulnerable. Good for you. Rosie